Guest Post - Temitope Bankole of www.jeenager.com

Temitope Bankole

WHAT EVERYONE OUGHT TO KNOW ABOUT FAILURE by Temitope Bankole

The fear of failure is very common in our society. Society sometimes places very high demands on us and our personal expectations about life can be downright ridiculous yet our insecurities stare at us and most of us can be helpless not knowing how to handle our deep seated insecurities of not wanting to be seen as a failure .

We are trained to ALWAYS come out tops in class anything less is not worthy of admiration,subtle messages are sent to our subconscious that you are ONLY worthy when you succeed even when it means using underhanded methods cause after all failure is a bastard right?

So in schools songs like 'olodo rapata' are recited to the not so 'intelligent' pupil by the class! How embarrassing that can be for anyone in that situation. But hey isn't that how the 'real world' works? We celebrate success and want to be associated with successful people without taking time to understand their journey to success land. We disassociate ourselves from people struggling to find their own feet.

So as adults we  carry the notion that failure is a bad thing and would rather not do anything than be laughed at*remember the olodo effect* lol ,failing to realize that people we see  as successful and celebrate, are people who have decided to fail forward,improve themselves and be outstanding.

Ok what is it about failure that you ought to know?

1. Failure in itself is not a bad thing,it's how you react and what you do with the process that determines weather it is bad or not.

2. Failure is inevitable- Rarely do things work out the first time you try! No one gets everything right all the time,everyone makes mistakes. While those mistakes aren't always fun they are not unto death *most times* The day you come to terms that failure is part of the human condition the better for you.

3. Failure can be great feedback- Feedback is the breakfast of champions. So when you step out of your comfort zone to pursue a goal and you don't succeed the first time,see it as feedback, learn your lessons,change your strategy and give it another shot.

4. Failure at a venture is not the end of life. People will talk o but why do they have their mouths isn't it to talk? Which one is your own? move on and keep looking for better ways to do things

5. Funny but true failure helps you stay grounded - See if you have failed before there's this humility that comes with the terrain. If you haven't failed at something before (except you are naturally grounded) the tendency to see yourself as invincible is high! Any how the fact you failed helps you stay grounded while you give it another shot.

New Interest in Entrepreneur and where they should be getting trained to run terrific businesses. Also I had the pleasure of listening to Mrs. Awosika train entrepreneurs.

I asked a question. I got the courage to stand up and ask a question.

How do you take your business from small time to big time?

You will get the answer in my next blog post. Know that it doesn't exclude a lot of hard work. Prepare to work hard and smart. You will get there! I will too!

Thankful Thursday...

And all things work together for good for those who love God and those who are called according to His purpose - Romans 8:28

I got an author certificate today. I also got late today, a tree fell across Ahmadu Bello Way, the yoruba phrase that is just right escapes me. Let me show you my eZine author certificate, I worked the hardest in my life to earn it so I am glad. It turns out the certificate is in PDF and I am not certain how to convert it to a PNG, JPEG or any other picture format.

Sisiyemmie is getting married to Bobonice today. They have probably finished their trad and are looking forward to a lovely white wedding tomorrow. I wonder if it is in Dubai, seeing as they won the 15 million naira for that wedding competition. I went by the blog and clicked a link to go to the site, see as many haters gather. They were arguing about who won and who deserved to win. I was just amazed. I didn't even bother my head.

What else is fun that is currently happening?

I have a writers meet on a Saturday soon. I am so going to be there. I also have a training for tuesday and thursdays for 8 weeks I can't make. I just have to call the wonderful people who shortlisted my name and tell them I have to take a rain check. Much as I love computers I can't be there but I am so glad to have made the shortlist. My months have been full of testimonies of God's goodness and it would be terribly introvertish of me to complain about the things I should be thanking God for so...

Baba God, thank You
I got my eyes on You.

George Clooney is getting married to..

George Clooney is getting married to a lebanese lady.

The gossip rags came out with a story that her mom was not in support of the marriage. They did so for the publicity value. The story can be read here

Who did this please?

You would be shocked to know that I was pleased because the article confirmed what I already know that the superstars, actors, actresses, musicians control their dirt all by themselves.

Some even create their own dirt (I am looking down with a big microscope at Wande Coal and all the times he has appeared naked. I am also looking at Mocheddah and L.D. 'Okpolo' eye even though I don't have okpolo eye').

Why am I pleased?

Twitter has taken the place of the newspapers all without trying. How do I know? If a bomb happens in Yobe or Abuja or wherever, I hear on twitter first. That Sudanese woman who was going to be killed, I heard on twitter that she got freed, I am waiting to hear that she has relocated to the Americas with her husband and two sons.



Why am I pleased?

I am a social media manager, that means more business for me. Smart advertisers won't go to the newspapers as often as they used to. They would come to social media: Facebook, twitter, linkedin, instagram, blogs and they will be needing social media managers for years to come.

If you are interested in being trained, holla me at tessadoghor@gmail.com I will teach you a few things and then I believe if you are creative enough, you will follow your nose.

I have a PR blog at www.imagineitincorporated.blogspot.com

I am learning to be an entrepreneur at www.udookonjo.com

Enjoy!

Tomorrow I am taking a cue from sisiyemmie.com and I am blogging about yummy food. I still have just one pic of the food but if you see it, you will place an order immediately. Working class peeps, she makes house calls also. Let's wait till tomorrow then.

Osewhen asked me what my faith means to me.
I didn't want to write much. I will just copy my comment and paste here.

Jesus is everything to me
I get so tongue-tied talking about Him
but I can write forever.

Here is what I wrote:

I am not perfect
I am by no means perfect in character
BUT
I know that I have come to the city of just men made perfect
I have confessed Jesus as LORD (and I think you should too)
It is important
My most important gift from Christianity is the Holy Ghost
I think that you should desire Him
He has turned my life upside down and right side up
He is so awesome

One of the first things He told me was “the letter kills but the Spirit gives life”.
It changed my life
My life aint perfect but in the painting of my life, the Holy Ghost has written lovely tapestries that religion would never do for me. I would rather have relationship with God than religion
I talk to God
I know that sounds crazy
He talks back to me and that is the most amazing thing about my faith
Instead of praying to God, I just chat with Him about the stuff I want or what I know I have in Him based on His word and I worship a lot
I always get chatty when I am done, I don’t complain
Instead I talk to God and appreciate Him and who He is and what He is on His own and who He is to me and How He is so awesome.
No time to complain to God when we should be chatting.

Well this is what I said.

For entrepreneurship (business people be alert): visit www.udookonjo.com and subscribe so that you can be coached weekly and get the tips for growing your awesome dreams.

Also, read http://www.romancemeetslife.com//2014/07/rml-women-udo-okonjo-of-wow-divas-and.html

and  http://jmadreflects.wordpress.com/2014/07/11/a-story-from-a-wow-diva/ I am so proud of these works. They are amazing and will add value to your life. Choose right.

Seek, Find, Live

I found this blog today. Her name is Dora

I read her post and felt hugged. Her words cut through.

I hear some words and I don't even think it pierces through the haze I sometimes feel. This got to my soul today and maybe it will get to yours too.

I saw so much word on her blog and maybe it was the word but I think her blog has a touch of the Holy Ghost. I can't say why I love the Holy Ghost, I just know that when I am conscious of Him, I feel alive. Like I have been living somehow 'without' that thing. I just know that I read her blog and the word ministered to my spirit. My soul felt good. Exodus 23:25 used to be my constant confession. It is on her blog too.

I am conscious of God. Too darn conscious of Him and I wouldn't have it any other way.

When I wasn't conscious of God, all I was conscious of, was how smart I am, how intelligent I am, how perfect my eyes, ears, nose, legs, body is. So it is not like I don't have flesh. I do. I just know what to prefer now. I prefer God. I put Him first. I kill my narcissistic tendencies when they show up, or rather when the Holy Spirit shows them to me. I am His and He is mine. There is nothing that the devil can do about it through whoever. Forever yoked to Christ and pledged to Him. My allegiance is to Him. His allegiance is to me and I trust in His word. I asked Him when I gave my life to Him or received His life; to prove Himself to me and He hasn't stopped. I know God on a supernatural plane. I don't view Him as far away. He is as close as I can voice out and call to Him. I do call and I will call. 

I am not soft. Nothing about me is soft. I do look soft on the outside but I have a very analytical, calculating brain. It doesn't fit my external looks. However I am not what I look like on the outside. God gave me a beautiful house and I am grateful for it. I am my recreated human spirit, alive to God and to righteousness, dead to sin and its baser nature.

I am so following that chic. There are not many people I read and I am instinctively inspired to write about God. There are few and I keep them close. I have lots of people I talk to but not many friends and I like it like that. God and I have a covenant that whoever and whatever I need will come my way. I am open to the people necessary for my destiny but the other people, I am not willing to invest my time, emotions and my energy in everyone BUT when I sense that something is necessary for my destiny, I give it everything I have got. I focus my energies in the direction that God is leading me and He does lead me.

Two CEOs. Read about Bukky George on Mrs. O's blog (http://www.udookonjo.com)

I get a sense of fulfilment from working on this blog because it is a nation builder. Nigeria's and indeed Africa's entrepreneurs and future leaders are being built via this blog so I feel a responsibility to give it all I have got but this will give vision and save the purpose of many. I love to help people birth their dreams because God so orchestrated my life that all the right people necessary to get me to where I am going always came to me and had the right words to say to me to get me moving on the God path. I am glad they were obedient, I am more glad that God in His wisdom caused me to be receptive to their words. I am blessed and because I am blessed I would like you to be also. I cannot do the difficult thing for you though, things like commitment and discipline and sticking to God's word like velcro. I can provide the information and resources that you need in the hope that it will cause you to wake up to your vision and start fulfilling the purpose God has for you.

God bless you all

PS 

I have an inkling this blog post will cause change. Thank you Holy Ghost for your guidance.I can feel God's hand on me. waoh.

Please be blessed. Do take advantage. Learn how. If you seek, you will find

It is the glory of God to hide a thing

It is the honour of kings to seek it out

Or something like that.

Blogging too!

I love blogging. It represents the uninhibited part of me. As a child, I was so impulsive, I would jump up and do an experiment and create something marvellous. Growing up, I knew I would have to lose the impulsiveness or get into trouble.

Photo Courtesy Google Images

I also had to learn tact because there were all sorts of nasty people outside the friend circle who did not mind street fighting for no good reason or for what they termed was ‘good enough reason’.

The naturally intelligent ‘me’ did not understand people resort to underhanded means and dishonourable character traits appeared. It was disgusting! It still is, difference is, now I half expect it.

Where is Nigeria's Department of Justice?
Picture Courtesy Google Image

Now that I am older, I understand that dishonourable traits and characteristics appear because your opponents/counterparts realise that they can never beat you on a level playing field and so they resort to many crooked practices. Very much like our Nigerian politicians. When competing against a good man, you stretch out your right hand to give a bribe so that another equally perverse soul can pervert justice.

Whatever, this is just an aside.

My blogging topic today is God and His nature and His character.

I know I have said this before but I will have to say it again, after all I didn’t get it immediately I heard it.

A dear friend shared something on social media and the conclusion of the matter was that God will punish you.

Growing up, my siblings and I had a time or two when we said to each other: God will punish you. Afterwards I would lie in bed wondering what form the punishment would come in.

It took me a while after being saved to discover that God doesn't punish. It is man who breaks the hedge. When a hedge is broken, it can be mended.

God is faithful and kind and loving.

Someone would counteract me now and say, God is a consuming fire. Yes He is. He consumed the sacrifice that Elijah put down. It was a sign that He was pleased with Elijah’s offering and then Elijah killed the 300/400 prophets of Baal.

God does not destroy his covenant children. As excellent as the old covenant is, we are not living under the old covenant; we are living under the new covenant. God bless the soul of the man of God who taught me this. He is a man that is not afraid to carry the mandate of God. I pray that the LORD God will strengthen me so that I also will have the power to carry what God says like I am carrying something special. I want to be able to hear God and speak it exactly as He says without feeling the need to add my bravado or feeling so inadequate as if, why would God choose me?

So God is not waiting to punish you with a good thing. God doesn't set traps. If you are not convinced, pray, fast and sincerely seek the face of God; He rewards those who diligently seek Him.

Yesterday’s post was going to be about my stubborn pursuers and the critics who will not let me or my family be; but I have handed them over to the LORD in prayer. I don’t need to deal with what God is dealing with. Thank God the Holy Ghost stopped me in time.

A word from my meditation this morning:

Many church don’t believe this BUT

i.                    God has not called us to dominate other human beings or manipulate them, that is witchcraft. God doesn’t act like that. He gives free will. Study His attributes

ii.                  God asks us to command the things on the earth. Have rule over them using the name of Jesus in prayer.

iii.                About other human beings, He says, we should ask of Him. He is the creator and He is able to handle them perfectly

iv.                God does not call us to revenge, He calls us to forgive and trust Him

v.                  God is written about in the bible. Read the bible and find out who He is. Don’t take my word for it or the word of anyone else

vi.                Don’t trust me. Trust God. Trust His word. He is the one to be magnified

That’s all for now! Until next time, I am living the favoured life God packaged for me and mine. I am content. I wouldn’t want to live any other life.

Shalom!

This week, learn a little about entrepreneurship, visit http://www.udookonjo.com